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There is always a time in life when you need to buy a present for a person that you hate with all your life. There will be that seasonal obligation to gift a person that gets on your nerves. A person that you cannot stand the mere sight off but yet you have to do what you have to do. Why, you might ask, why do I have to gift a person that I do not even like. Well get this punk, that person that you hate might be your boss, so then you certainly have to get him or her something otherwise it will only worsen your relationship. Or it can be that step parents or the mother-in-law (wonder why they always show up in haters lists) that you do not like! What will you do? You need to gift them. Or it can be that dear friend of your love that you hate from the core of your heart;you have to gift them so that you do not offend your one true love. Yes yes we know that life is a messy little biaach but hey, I have gathered for you a list of ideas for gifts to give to people you hate. So here goes the highly in-demand list of things to get them itching ride where they can’t reach. The list works on the principle “the strength of the itch is directly proportional to the distance of the reach, the higher the distance the stronger the itch”!Happy hating!
10. MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTION TO WHAT THEY HATE MOST
The first and the foremost will be the oldest and most used HATE gift in the world. Presenting “A subscription for the Magazine that your target hates the most”. What you can basically do is give them a fully paid monthly subscription and try to ensure that the subscription is not cancellable for at least a few months. You can add insult to the injury if for e.g. you have known your target to go on and on about how a certain race has messed up the whole neighbourhood , you can find out exactly what magazine favors these people a lot and then ensure that your target is on the mailing list. This will really spice up things and is sure to drive your target up the wall. Good for extreme pleasure.
9. ANTI-THEIR-RELIGION MAGAZINES
This particular hate gift is specifically for those people who want to hit it really low and take revenge for the last time they dissed you at that joint diner. So what you do is you find out which religious sect is the target particularly itchy too and get a subscription to the totally opposite religion and bingo! Better still is to give them the subscription for All American Atheist Organization filled with all the love if you are sure that your target is the religious kind. A very low strike but totally worth. It is bound to strike at the right spot.
8. A SINGLE TICKET TO A FAMOUS AND EXPENSIVE CONCERT
I admit that this one is another very tried hate gift but oh well! It works so it is here on this list of mine. Now there are two ways at doing this. Suppose there is this famous very expensive concert or drama coming to town. And you know for a fact that the target loves what ever is being present. Well waste not a moment and get that ticket, JUST ONE, and gift away man! What this will do is add insult to the injury because the target will either have to buy another ticket, thus spending money; or they would have to go alone and look like the loser who has no friends! Either way is win-win for you!
7. SEND A HUNTERS RIFLE TO AN ANIMAL LOVER
another good one will be giving the PETA members a membership fully paid for the National Rifle Association for example. That is sure to piss them off to no extent. I would like to take a moment to state that this article or list you might say, will sound a little rude at time but it is only because we are compiling a list of gifts for the people that we hate. It is only natural for that hate to show up a little. Coming back to the topic, you can also note the email address of the target and then spam their accounts with information regarding all the dead-animal-supporting agencies. What fun eh?
6. A STEAK HOUSE VOUCHER FOR THE VEGANS
And then there are the vegetarians! The maximum damage that you do to a vegetarian target is get them a good old paid house voucher for the towns most famous Steak House. Or better yet, give them HAM for thanksgiving. That ought to charm things right over now wouldn’t it? It is surely a nice way to tell them to shut the hell up!
5. A GIFT CERTIFICATE TO A RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT STORE
So supposing there is a couple that has individually been ranting on and on about how their marriage is so on the rocks, and yes you would have had total sympathy as a human being if they weren’t such ACE holes but oh well! For such freaks, what would be more better than a discount voucher for a shop that serves all kinds relationship building stuff physical that is if you know what I mean. You can also actually go out there and select the products your self along with a written demonstration on how you propose they should be used. Again a very low move but totally worth it!
4. A FRAMED PICTURE OF YOURSELF TO THE MOTHER-IN-LAW THAT HATES YOU
And now for everyone’s favorite target, be it guy or girl, the hateful and arrogant mother-in-law who just cannot help putting her butt into every personal affair that there ever is. So, the best way for revenge, I mean come-on people lets show some respect to the elderly hate-targets and keep the attack minimal, will be to get a pretty picture of yourself framed neatly and voila! It will do the trick!
3. A WEIGHT WATCHERS CHART TO THE SAME MOTHER-IN-LAW
Another one for the hateful mother-in-law target, a weight loss program plan. This can even work wonders for ANY female target on your hate list. You can also get a copy of magazine like “eat fat lose weight” or the likes of it and gift it! You might want to think about inventing a book named “Would-you-consider-shutting-up-and-getting-off-your-fat-behind” and get it printed! There are always better options for increase hate levels!
2. AN ANNOYING GIFT FOR THE CHILD OF THE ANNOYING COUPLE
This one is an interesting way to take revenge from an annoying couple. When ever the next birthday of one of their children come up, just take a trip around the TOY-R-US company or whatever you might find near you. Select a cheap toy (harmless of course, we do not want to target kids, we are not that morbid, no sir!) that makes a lot of very annoying sounds and does not even shut up soon and eats A LOT of batteries. That ought to annoy the hell out of the hate-target parents and MISSION thus ACCOMPLISHED!
1. SOCKS OR THE RE-GIFTED FRUIT CAKE
This one on the first is my top favorite one: socks or a re-gifted fruit cake. These are the kinds of gifts that is sure to tell them that “Hey! Incase you have not noticed, we HATE you!” You can add christmas themed clothes to this list as well. They are also the perfect I-Hate-U gift. Show then that you do not give a shit and make it as annoying as hell. Your gift: the joy of upsetting your hate-target!